A reflection over coffee here...

This entry was written on my journal last September 30, 2014.

“To sustain a lifestyle which excludes others, or to sustain enthusiasm for that selfish ideal, a globalization of indifference has developed. Almost without being aware of it, we end up being incapable of feeling compassion at the outcry of the poor, weeping for other people’s pain, and feeling a need to help them, as though all this were someone else’s responsibility and not our own. The culture of prosperity deadens us; we are thrilled if the market offers us something new to purchase. In the meantime all those lives stunted for lack of opportunity seem a mere spectacle; they fail to move us.”

             - Pope Francis

I couldn’t remember where it was written, but Pope Francis also said something like one of the great evils in the world is that economies favor the rich and continually oppress the poor.

Do you know the feeling that you have no choice but to become dependent to those with power and money because you need their “salary” to you to survive; even if you hate being so dependent to them. If you fight back to survive and become independent, they have the power to oppress you further.

[I didn’t include one paragraph here since it criticizes a famous writer’s theory on leveraging of world economies. I don’t believe this so-called “leverage” to be good in the long run, since it’s just another form of neocolonialism.]

I also hate the fact that my current realistic choices are (1) to become an outsourced writer forever, or (2) to become a corporate slave, or (3) to become an OFW just to sustain the needs of my family and relatives. Maybe perhaps I should leave the country as well like my other friends and find greener pastures…

I also hate the fact that I couldn't do anything to lessen the backbreaking work of my father as he works in some cargo ship abroad. I hate the fact that he sacrificed most of his life and personal dreams just to give the best to his family – everything from what we need and want to whatever we desire and dream. He gave his all just to help us fulfill our dreams. I just wished that I was able to do something to carry some of that burden of his as well...and help him fulfill his dreams too.

I hate the fact that I don’t know whether I should pursue my dreams even if I have no money in the bank, or should I start facing reality that this is all I’m capable of doing and I should do it since it’s going to put money in the bank. I really do want to test out those theories concerning “follow your dreams” or “follow your heart” and see if I could really succeed against all circumstances surrounding me which seem to push me backwards.

I shall check this post five years from now to see if I have somewhat succeeded against all odds (cue music)…


The Hands of My Father

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